So, how's this for ultimate trust?
I imagine a few cynics out there see a little dog with a death wish.
Others may see proof that curiosity really will kill the cat, er pup.I see the power of trust in action.
The power to defy even the most basic of instincts - self preservation. The power to change the game.
When we trust in ourselves, we go bravely into new situations.
Self trust is the fuel that powers us to explore new worlds, test new theories, expand our horizons. When we trust ourselves, we have the courage to move beyond the known and safe. We move beyond our past and reach for our full potential.
When we don't trust ourselves, we're tethered to a predictable, repeatable world.
When we trust others, we can do the unimaginable.
When we unite with others in total trust, focused on a common goal, there are no limits to what we can accomplish. We can reach the stars, save our planet and maybe even balance a budget. Imagine the trust it takes to create this human chalice. Wow.
When we don't trust each other, we all lose.
So What Happened to Trust?
I was looking at a contract with my publishing house last week. It got me thinking about trust. This contract was lengthy and detailed. Fair, but very detailed. Yet there were still a few things I had to take on trust. I did it. But how many others would?
My how times have changed.
When I started consulting, I took client work on a handshake. That's all I needed. You see, I don't want to work with anyone who I can't trust. Today, everyone wants a contract. Mostly to protect themselves in case of litigation.
What a way to start a relationship.
If we live in mistrust today - where will we be tomorrow?
Lost trust impacts all of us. Here's an example. My horse trainer's insurance company refused to allow dogs on her property because they were afraid of lawsuits. Mind you, 70 or so horses live on this property 24 x 7. Up to 6 of them run free during the day at one time - along the road and in front of people's homes. It's horsey heaven! And FYI, my trainer has allowed dogs for twenty years now - without one single problem.
Anyway - the insurance thing sounds like no big deal. Right?
Not to my pup Diego. The ranch is his favorite place to go. I pick up my boots and he begins his doggie dance. Barking and running in circles - joy oozing out of every hair. Now that favorite place is gone. How do I explain to his pure trusting doggie self that because of human mistrust - he loses?
Without trust, we will lose more than our freedom.
The weight of mistrust is heavy on our businesses and our economy. Legal costs are skyrocketing, progress is slowing. Soon we won't be able to do anything without a legal release. Imagine - signing a release to eat at a restaurant, enter a mall, pump our own gas.
A friend called me last night to vent about a legal hassle with marketing materials. Hey company is taking every single marketing piece - from outbound emails to landing pages to spec sheets, through a legal process. The results are a disaster for the business. Every compelling, though factual, word and statement is gone. There's nothing left but pablum now that the legal beagles are done. It's a waste of money and time to use the poor content that's being 'allowed' by the legal teams. It's ridiculous - and such a sad statement of our culture today.
We cannot move forward without trust.
We can Rekindle Our Trust.
If we take a step toward trust, others will follow our example. The world won't change overnight, but we can change it over time. Hopefully before we have to sign a waiver to have a meal at a restaurant. So I'm starting my own little trust initiative. Who knows, maybe it will rub off!
I'm going to step up myself and do the following five exercises to rekindle my own trust, and hopefully stimulate some trust in those around me.
1) Shake hands on the deal. I'm beginning a small project in my home. I've been waiting for a detailed estimate, but that's changing. I'm going to shake hands on the deal and let the work begin. I'm going to show my contractor that I trust him to do a great job and charge me a fair rate.
2) Get a haircut. I'm not going to tell my stylist what I want. He's probably going to faint - but I'm going to keep my mouth shut. He knows me, he does a great job. So instead of warning him about trimming too much and checking each snip of the scissors, or asking him for the 50th time if the color is the right blend - I'm going to walk in and trust him.
3) Trust a friend. I have someone in my life that I adore as a brother, but he's not exactly the most responsible person you'll ever meet. He lives in my guest cottage and helps me with my property. I tend to prod and remind him of chores and deadlines. He resents it and we snipe sometimes. Well, no more. I'm going to get over myself and change my attitude. I'm going to back off and let him see that I'm trusting him to do the right things.
4) Have a trust meeting with my associates. I'm going to put all the cards on the table and ask my associates if they have reasons to not trust me or my approaches. I'm going to listen to the feedback, and take actions to fill any holes in their trust.
5) Get back to trusting myself. I was a pretty fair pianist in my youth. Then I quit playing, for too many reasons to explain. I've tried to start playing again many times. I can't play like I did once. I can't even begin to read the music I played at the ripe old age of thirteen. Each time I start to play again - I stop. I don't trust myself to learn to read music, to start over. So I don't play. That's going to change. I'm going to play and trust myself to learn - again!
So there's my own personal plan to add a bit of trust back into my world. I just realized something pretty interesting. By sharing my five steps to trust, I took a sixth step.
I trusted all of you.
It wasn't really that hard, after all.
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